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"Jesus, What Do We Suck At"?


What tribe are you from?

There is a new trend among some Christians. What Christian tribe do you belong to, is the question being asked. What Christian tribe are you from?

Tribe--community--gang. What's the difference?

Not only do you have to identify your tribe, but you also need to learn how to live within this tribe. Living within a tribe is called a community. There are hundreds of books written on the subject of community. I've actually read many good ones. And some not-so-good ones.

Why would someone write a book on how to live within a tribe/community? Is something the matter with us?
Isn't living in a community as basic and instinctual as sleeping and eating?

Sampler

Look around, we have online communities, gay communities, gardening communities, homeschool communities, church communities, suburb communities, golf communities, exclusive communities, gated communities, ecovillage communities, intentional communities, Amish communities, hippie communities, grunge communities, communist communities, KKK communities, black communities, white communities, hispanic communities, gang communities, etc, etc, etc.
I could go on endlessly. I might even start a 'community identifying' community!

Do we really have to learn how to DO community?

The idolatry of modernization and industrialization

For a long, long time now, we Americans have lived in the shadows of modernization. One of the mantras of modernization is that 'bigger is better'.
Along with that came the idea of the 'assembly line--mass production'. Some would purport it as the greatest gift of God to human kind.
I'm not going to knock the benefits or deal with the political issues here, I just want to ask one question:
What has modernization and industrialization done to communities? Particularly Christian communities A.K.A. the 'church'?



Bigger is better

Take the two top ideas from modernization and apply them to the church. What do you get?

Churches--bigger is better.

Churches--assembly line production.

Oh my! Shall I say more?
"Houston, we have a problem"!


We can do better

Don't you long for something better?
Something more intimate?
I do.
I want to know people and I want to be known by people. After seventeen+ years with Jesus, I can admit that I still suck at relationships.

Why?

Loner boy

I was born to be a loner--and a loner I was. After an entire life as a loner, do you know what I discovered? Loners are lonely. Very lonely. But we won't admit it because that makes us vulnerable.
Being a loner is a badge of honor.
'I don't need anybody'! Is the foolish cry of the loner.
We are not exactly what you would call, 'community builders'.

Are you lonely when you stand in a crowd? How about when you stand in the crowd at your 'church'?
Some days, yes--some days, no? Me too.

Here's the deal, if you are an American, you probably suck at relationships. If we were good at it, would we even need Jesus?

Me: "Jesus, what do we suck at"?

Jesus: "You suck at loving God, and you suck at loving your neighbor".

Me: "Oh".

De-industrializing the church

I have a thought.
Smaller is better and people are messy; people can't be reproduced on an assembly line.

I think maybe we want more people in our 'churches' so we don't have to get intimate with the few that we have.
Big crowds promote anonymity.
Big crowds don't say, 'come and join us'.
Big crowds say, 'come and see'. As in come be a spectator.
I have actually known people who will deliberately avoid a small church gathering because it is too intimate. They want to slide in and slide out unnoticed.

My point is, when more people become believers and gather with us, why do we try to hoard them into huge gatherings(bigger is better) rather that send them out into intimate messy communities?
Why do people resist going out?

Why do we see big 'churches' as successful and small 'churches' as, "Don't worry, have faith in the little things"?

Wait right there, Marc! "We have small groups"!!

Sorry, but isn't a 'small group' just another word for a 'church' gathering? Or at the least, a developing new 'church' gathering?

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not condemning big churches just because they are big. But I believe it's more about an attitude that is lurking within many of us. A weakness.

Making a difference through hospitality

Do you desire to know somebody else?
How about when they are messy? Same answer?

Do you avoid the total train wrecks in your 'church'? If yes, why?

Would you invite the 'messy' people into your home? A stranger? A loner?



In 1 Corinthians it says this: "The eye can never say to the hand, 'I don’t need you.' The head can’t say to the feet, 'I don’t need you'. 
In fact, some parts of the body that seem weakest and least important are actually the most necessary. 
And the parts we regard as less honorable are those we clothe with the greatest care. So we carefully protect those parts that should not be seen, while the more honorable parts do not require this special care. 
So God has put the body together such that extra honor and care are given to those parts that have less dignity. 
This makes for harmony among the members, so that all the members care for each other. 
If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honored, all the parts are glad".

Have you ever thought that we need the 'messy' people? Have you ever thought that you might be one of those 'messy' people?

I think the first step to overcoming a weakness, is to admit you have one. I admit it--I suck at relationships.

I think hospitality is one of the number one ways for us 'assembly line lovin humans' to change the world for Jesus.
Intentional, deliberate hospitality. Open yourself up--give your life to someone else.

Some of you are great at this already, but do you realize you are as rare as Big Foot in New York? Use your gift to help others to open up.

Years ago a good teacher of mine made a comment that I will never forget. I was a fairly new christian and I was struggling to find a family community within the 'church'.
I told him that I try to get into peoples lives, but they are always so busy.
He replied, 'So they would have you think'.
Are you too busy? Do you want others to think you are too busy?

Opening the door

When you take someone into your home and you admit your real life struggles--the door begins to open for a relationship to develop. I don't mean whiny, poor me, pay attention to me crap. I mean real genuine admission of faults and weaknesses.
Something changes.
We change.

Try it this week. Get together with someone you normally wouldn't and 'open the door'.
Invite an acquaintance over and kick the door open a little farther.

Don't be stingy with your life. Give it away. Jesus did.




Song here:
Tear Down These Walls


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